depressed man
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Saint or Sinner? The addicted child.

The scrapbook of Danny’s life tells one side of his story – Eagle Scout, mountaineer, gymnast, Mormon missionary, soldier, favorite uncle, friend, brother.  And then a casket carried by father and siblings to a grave in a military cemetery when he was just 27, dead from… Read more

Anniversary picture
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A murder in Texas

This is us on our 21st Anniversary trip – the weekend we met the murderer, and the weekend we saw the redemption of a parent’s worst nightmare. My husband Paul prides himself on choosing funky hotels to celebrate our anniversary. There was the “castle” in… Read more

Black and white sheep
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Are you giving your black sheep a baaad rap?

Sheep get no respect. Nobody wants a child to turn out to be the “lost sheep” or the “black sheep.” It’s time to take a broader look at these misunderstood mammals, and at your adult children who fit the description. You may have been wrong… Read more

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When you need a parental do-over

There they stood, a father who had expected more maturity than his son possessed, and a 17-year-old boy with a hangover trying to figure out what happened. “Sure, I let him have a few drinks with me at home,” the father said to me. “But… Read more

Child factory worker
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Your Child: Asset or Ornament?

Why did you have children?  Your answer would be very different from that of your great grandparents. Even as recently as 75 years ago in America, children were valued as contributing laborers in the family. Today they are embellishments. They exist to give their parents… Read more

Praying hands
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Leaving the Faith Part 3

If your adult child has left your faith, and their choice is keeping you up at night, it’s time to take the focus off of them and find support for yourself. In two recent blog posts I addressed several possible reasons children leave the church… Read more

Street signs, intersection of Success and Fairlure
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You had a plan for your child? How amusing.

Expectations are the seeds of disappointment.  Yes, those lofty goals you set for your baby fresh out of the womb may be the reason you are kicking yourself 20 plus years later: “My son the doctor.”  “My daughter the astronaut.”  Even your most modest dreams… Read more

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Leaving the faith

If your adult child has left the church in which you raised them, you join an ever growing community of parents trying to figure out why. Parents who feel a strong connection to their faith wonder why they didn’t pass that on to their children.… Read more

A brain
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Thinking makes it so

If you have a troublesome adult child, you may have it within the power of your own brain to make a difference. It will require you to dust off your “reticular activating system.” Two decades spent as a reporter in newsrooms taught me something valuable… Read more