All posts filed under “Problems parents face

Praying hands
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Leaving the Faith Part 3

If your adult child has left your faith, and their choice is keeping you up at night, it’s time to take the focus off of them and find support for yourself. In two recent blog posts I addressed several possible reasons children leave the church… Read more

Street signs, intersection of Success and Fairlure
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You had a plan for your child? How amusing.

Expectations are the seeds of disappointment.  Yes, those lofty goals you set for your baby fresh out of the womb may be the reason you are kicking yourself 20 plus years later: “My son the doctor.”  “My daughter the astronaut.”  Even your most modest dreams… Read more

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Leaving the faith

If your adult child has left the church in which you raised them, you join an ever growing community of parents trying to figure out why. Parents who feel a strong connection to their faith wonder why they didn’t pass that on to their children.… Read more

A brain
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Thinking makes it so

If you have a troublesome adult child, you may have it within the power of your own brain to make a difference. It will require you to dust off your “reticular activating system.” Two decades spent as a reporter in newsrooms taught me something valuable… Read more

Man climbing a rock face
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Make Room For Daddy

  Treacherous cliffs are a metaphor for my parenting.  My kids want to dangle from them. I stand at the base wringing my hands, even now that my kids are grown. If you’re that danger-averse parent, listen and learn. When our children were young we… Read more

An Apple and an Orange
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Apples and Oranges: The Envy Trap

Our local indoor swimming pool has a lazy river. Early morning hours are reserved for a “water walk” in the warm current. The crowd is mostly older folks walking with the current to relieve the aches and pains of aging. I usually walk upstream and… Read more

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The Best Laid Plans…

My son Will had his college fund in the bag at the age of 7 as a result of a class action law suit. He had suffered long term health problems from drinking our local water after a preventable sewage spill into the water system. … Read more

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The Nuclear Option

Disappointment is a powerful weapon in a parent’s arsenal. It’s not the same as anger, frustration or fear. Disappointment says “I know better than you.”  It says, “You didn’t do it my way and therefore you did it the wrong way.” Disappointment from a parent… Read more

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Us vs. Them

Some families have mottos or mission statements. Our family has a good-humored rejoinder: “You don’t know what you’re talking about.” It helps to diffuse a variety of family disagreements – our way of agreeing to disagree. It is a phrase that parents of adult children… Read more

Hovering helicopter
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Raised By Wolves

At the ripe old age of 40, I inherited three step children, ages 8,10 and 12. One of the first preservation skills I learned as a new mother was to distance myself from their faults. “I wasn’t there when you were born,” was my go-to… Read more