All posts filed under “Parenting styles

Balcony scene
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Speak now or forever hold your peace?

Romeo and Juliet is more than a Shakespearean tragedy about teen lovers trying to break free of their oppressive parents. It is a phenomenon recognized by some social scientists as “the Romeo and Juliet effect:” Johnny and Jane fall in “love;” their parents say, “over… Read more

Angry Trump
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Surviving the mean season

It’s that magical season when families gather, tension builds and arguments flare. No, I’m not talking about Christmas. I’m talking about the time in America between election and inauguration – the “mean season.” I haven’t taken a poll, but judging by social media, our four… Read more

Swimming Toddler
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Just let them go under

The toddlers who lined up at the edge of the swimming pool were learning a life lesson: Jump in and your mom will catch you. Or maybe she won’t. Either way, you’re probably not going to drown. I watched the “Mommy and Me” swim class… Read more

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My son the doctor (or maybe the “virtual social influencer”)

This is your idea of a career for your 20-something child – doctor, lawyer, engineer, teacher. This is their idea of a job – a flex-hours position doing something you’ve never heard of in some hipster-run company in California where every day is casual Friday, the… Read more

Black and white sheep
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Are you giving your black sheep a baaad rap?

Sheep get no respect. Nobody wants a child to turn out to be the “lost sheep” or the “black sheep.” It’s time to take a broader look at these misunderstood mammals, and at your adult children who fit the description. You may have been wrong… Read more

Child factory worker
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Your Child: Asset or Ornament?

Why did you have children?  Your answer would be very different from that of your great grandparents. Even as recently as 75 years ago in America, children were valued as contributing laborers in the family. Today they are embellishments. They exist to give their parents… Read more

A brain
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Thinking makes it so

If you have a troublesome adult child, you may have it within the power of your own brain to make a difference. It will require you to dust off your “reticular activating system.” Two decades spent as a reporter in newsrooms taught me something valuable… Read more

Man climbing a rock face
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Make Room For Daddy

  Treacherous cliffs are a metaphor for my parenting.  My kids want to dangle from them. I stand at the base wringing my hands, even now that my kids are grown. If you’re that danger-averse parent, listen and learn. When our children were young we… Read more

An Apple and an Orange
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Apples and Oranges: The Envy Trap

Our local indoor swimming pool has a lazy river. Early morning hours are reserved for a “water walk” in the warm current. The crowd is mostly older folks walking with the current to relieve the aches and pains of aging. I usually walk upstream and… Read more

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The Best Laid Plans…

My son Will had his college fund in the bag at the age of 7 as a result of a class action law suit. He had suffered long term health problems from drinking our local water after a preventable sewage spill into the water system. … Read more